But, even though the holiday is a corporate creation, the outside pressure to be in a relationship on Valentine’s Day can still make a guy feel incredibly lonely, especially if he lets it get to him.
After all, those corporations spend a lot of time convincing you how you need to buy your true love something and the more valuable the better. But, how can you buy her something if you don’t have a true love?
Sadly, corporations don’t sell true loves. Well, at least not the reputable ones.
But, don’t worry. You don’t have to spend Valentine’s Day with your face in your tear stained pillow. That’s why we offer a single guy’s Valentine’s Day survival guide. Follow this advice and V-day will be a lot less painful for you and way less cringe inducing for others.
No woman ever has said, “I feel so sorry for that guy. I think I’ll date him.” Besides, you don’t want pity dates anyway (at least you shouldn’t). So, even if you’re single and sad on Valentine’s Day, don’t advertise that fact to the world. You’ll only tell everyone that you’re single. And, you’ll also tell them that you’re pathetically single.
I know this is difficult. You may be single and angry and/or sad about it, but unfortunately, moping is just going to make you more single and more sad.
You don’t want moping around on a Hallmark holiday to spoil your chances to date those girls in your life the other days of the year. Resist this urge.
Forget About Women
If you are sad and depressed, that’s okay, and means you’re human! However, there’s little benefit in wallowing in pity and despair. It’s not very empowering. Rather than moping in your house with a box of Chinese food and a case of beer, find something fun to do.
Forget about women for a day. You’d be amazed at how freeing it can be to focus on yourself (and others in your social network) rather than obsessively trying to get laid. I’ve written an article about the benefits of a detox day from women to free your mind to be your best self. Why not make that day Valentine’s Day?
Hang out with your friends, go to a concert, workout at the gym, or just go to a random place and try to make new friends. Don’t wallow in despair desperately thinking about women. Rather, get out and live our life.
When I was in my late teens I was so bothered about not having a girlfriend that I spent every waking second trying to get one. Every time I hung out with my friends, I made sure we focused on that. Looking back, I wish I just would have focused on enjoying their company more.
Look on the Bright Side
The average person spends over $140.00 on Valentine’s Day! That’s a lot of money to throw out just because it’s expected. While being single can suck, it also has upsides.
One of these is that you don’t have to worry about stressing over the perfect gift or spending a ton of money on someone you might not even know well.
And, remember, being single isn’t necessarily a recipe for misery. One study found that single people were ultimately more socially connected than married couples, and that marriage undermined other very important relationships, like friendships. Another study found men in particular regretted losing the social ties with friends that often comes with relationship.
Avoid Excessive Displays
You might be tempted to make Valentine’s Day the time to talk to your crush about your feelings or win over some random girl in the office. A high value, hot guy who sends two dozen roses to his girlfriend in the office will make every other woman there desire him and become extremely jealous of his girlfriend.
However, if you try that with a girl who barely knows you or has no idea you like her romantically, it will backfire. We’re talking anywhere from “avoid you at the lunch table” to “call the cops and post about #metoo” backfire.
If you want to ask someone out, just do it. And, don’t wait until Valentine’s Day to do it. Definitely, don’t be weird just because it’s Valentine’s Day.
People Don’t Care
You might be crushingly lonely on Valentine’s Day, but, I’ll let you in on a fun fact: people don’t care. OK, it’s not really fun. And, your mom might care. But, no one wants to hear about your desperation, whether in person or on your social media feed.
You might think you’re pouring your heart out authentically to the world, but everyone else just sees it as sad cringe that they will either laugh at or feel awkward about on your behalf.
It goes back to the first point. People might sympathize, they might empathize, but, in the end, no one wants to be your counselor or put up with your whining. Most people are too concerned with their own problems to take on yours too.
Do Something About It
That is probably the best way to describe the way most guys deal with their lack of dates and relationships. Sure, they might try a new dating app. But, everything else stays the same. So, a new app is “same shit, different toilet.”
Dating is a skill and if a guy is lonely, it’s likely he lacks the social skills to meet women, build rapport with them, and sustain long term success. Or, he simply isn’t attractive enough and might not know how to improve that.
Fortunately, there are ways to develop the skills to get a great woman and become the guy she wants, not just on Valentine’s Day, but everyday of the year.
We offer various services and courses to help you become your most attractive and learn social skills to master conversations, rapport building, and getting her to fall for you (whether in person or online).
Check them out and get into a relationship for February 14th…next year. Then, you won’t even need a Valentine’s Day survival guide.