Image courtesy of dan / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Awhile back, David and I were out at a restaurant together and ran across a bunch of guys best described as good ole boys. They came over and talked to us.

This was at a local, country themed type of place. Most of the people were dressed in country type attire and that was certainly the theme on the televisions spread throughout the place and the background music.

I grew up in a more rural area and certainly have a fondness for it. Lots of my friends come from this background and currently live in a rural setting. However, David and I are in no way rural in the way we dress or our interests. And, it was probably pretty obvious that night since we were dressed in our more urban styles.

When two of the guys came over to talk to us, they were commenting on our outfits. We laughed it off and they continued. They started talking about their diesel trucks. I laughed and asked if they filled them up with the eco-friendly diesel or if they were ruining the environment. Note: I was not peddling environmentalism. I did this as a joke and they knew it.

They started laughing and admitted they were surprised I knew anything about diesel vehicles. I told them that I grew up in the country and we started talking about a few of those things. Eventually, all five of the group came to our table.

They started talking about ages and couldn’t believe we were both thirty-four. To prove it to them, I showed them my concealed carry license. Of course, this was on purpose and it had the desired effect. They thought it was super cool that these alleged outsiders had a gun license.

By the end of the evening, they were telling us how much they liked us and even bought our dinner! One of the guys admitted that he originally came over to screw with us, but that he was glad he did because we turned out to be really cool.

How did we win over this group of guys who seemed so different and originally were even somewhat hostile?

We did it, I believe, a few ways.

First, we refused to be rattled by their attitudes. We knew they were screwing around with us in the beginning. However, we didn’t care. We didn’t escalate, but just stayed cool. In essence, they expected us to get mad. We didn’t and that comes across as high value.

Second, we built rapport with them. While I certainly am not living the rural lifestyle, I have lived it before and know a lot about it. I drew on my experiences and shared knowledge. While I don’t compromise my core beliefs, I can talk about many, many topics. Plus, I am an urban oriented guy who loves certain rural things (like guns). I focused on those.

Finally, I refused to treat them like stereotypes, even though they initially treated me that way. I was cool and didn’t prejudge them. And, people respond to that. David and I showed them that we were both mature and confident enough to accept them while also remaining true to ourselves.

So, we won over the good ole boys and had an awesome evening. And, we got a free meal out of it. With these tips, you can win over all types too.

A field report about Taco Bell? Of course, we always try to keep it classy. But, in all seriousness, Taco Bell is a great place to not be, well, serious. David and I stopped by Taco Bell recently to get some food for a family member whose identity we won’t reveal. We weren’t about to let the situation slide by without doing a little bit of magic.

When we got to the register the lady working clearly looked like she didn’t want to be there or deal with us. For us, that was an open invitation, of course. When she asked us what we wanted, we said tacos. She told us that they had briefly run out of beef, but would have more soon.

Taco Bell running out of beef could either be annoying or an opportunity for laughter. Obviously we chose laughter.

David (smiling): “We have some cows for sale if you’re interested.”
Employee (very serious): “Um, OK.”
Me (also smiling): “He’s right and we’re letting them go really cheap because they’re diseased.”
Employee (now smiling): Um.
Employees in Back (laughter)

Then, we continued with our order and she was much friendlier to us and the customer behind us.

What happened?

Basically, we cut through her obvious wall to interaction. I’m sure working at Taco Bell has to suck. David and I know that and don’t expect her to “serve” us. So, I’m sure our empathy came through when we talked.

Second, we used humor with her. Everyone, even those with high walls to social interaction, still wants humor and fun in their lives. The walls to get to it are just higher. Notice our use of observational and situational humor.

Finally, we didn’t let her attitude scare us away. Was she beautiful? No. Was she nice initially? No way! But, we saw her as a human being worthy of our attention. Not only that, but we saw her bad attitude (which was really probably just shyness combined a lack of joy in her job) as a challenge.

Next time you go out and order some food turn it into a chance to meet someone new, have a little fun, and make someone else’s day a little better.

In many ways, this website has been focused on advice and self help type of tips. However, there aren’t a whole lot of examples of these tips in action. Trust me, they work. My life is living proof. But, it’s hard to explain the tips and tell lots of stories about them working in an article that doesn’t stretch into a few thousand words. That is where field reports come in.

Being popular is extremely fun. It’s also exciting and entertaining, not only for the popular guy, but also the ones who are around him. We want our readers to not only learn how to create that excitement through self help articles, but also see how exciting and fun that advice can actually be through real examples.

So, starting from this point forward, our writers will be giving field reports of how the material we’ve created plays out in the real world. Obviously names (and occasionally locations and other small details) will be changed to protect the privacy of those we meet, but otherwise they will be totally true examples of going out in the world and taking it by storm (i.e. being popular).

I hope you gain a couple of things from these reports. First, I hope you can see just how fun and amazing being popular is. I want to you feel the joy I feel when I go out and try these techniques. Why? Because I believe the world needs more popular, confident, and excellent men. It makes the world a better, happier, and more excellent place.

Second, these reports will give you ideas for your own life and social interactions. You can go out and mimic our humor, use our lines (adapted to your situation, of course), and put yourself in similar situations where you can have fun. While some of these reports will be at unusual events or in special circumstances, in most cases they will be from everyday life. Yes, your everyday life can be a blast too.

So, we are adding a field reports category page and will be posting reports. Check back often!