Dating Tips For Men: Five Things You Need To Know

man embracing woman

Image courtesy of photostock] / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Women are difficult to understand at times. Not only that, but lots of “common sense” advice about women (be nice, be yourself, treat them like princesses) doesn’t work! So, lots of guys end up doing the same thing over and over again and getting the same result (being single).

However, here are a few dating tips for men that actually work. While nothing is sure in this world, these will help you play the dating game to actually win.

Actions, Not Words

I used to listen to women about their preferences. They’d say they wanted a nice, sweet guy who treated them like a princess. And, I believed them!

I should’ve watched their actions. These women who said they wanted nice guys actually dated brash jerks.

This isn’t really a dating tip as much as it is laying the foundation for the other tips. Women aren’t always in touch with what they subconsciously like in men. Or they aren’t willing to admit it because it goes against expectations. However, if you like a girl, watch her actions. Look at her typical boyfriend or the guys she says she wants to date. Those are who true tastes.

Nice Guys Finish Last

Women, especially younger ones, typically don’t go for the “nice guys.” By nice guy, I mean an agreeable, passive guy who puts her on a pedestal. This is a sure way to get put in the friend zone.

I’m not advocating for being a jerk or rude. So, be a good guy. Be excellent. Have high standards and stick to them. And, show her you can be sensitive (at times). But, don’t be a squishy, nice, passive guy who bores women to tears. Be assertive, confident, and even a little edgy, especially on the first date.

High Value Men Finish First

This is one of the most important dating tips for men. Evolution made women desire powerful, confident providers and protectors. Even independent modern women still have this need.

Some people are just naturally high value: they are rich, own fancy cars, and have power at work and elsewhere. Other guys must demonstrate their value in other ways. Fortunately if you’re not a millionaire, being funny, having confidence, possessing good looks, and other things are also considered high value.

Show her your intrinsic value, especially early. Arrive in a nice car (if you have it), look fit and stylishly dressed, let your humor and intelligence come out, etc. But (and this is important), don’t come across as a bragging jerk. Anyone who has to strain to show his value comes across as insecure (and low value).

Now, you may want to watch a video where Tod, a nice guy who lives with his mom, explains dating.

Pass The Tests

Women typically throw out little tests to see how a guy reacts. They are ways of sifting out the lower value guys. After all, hot women can be choosy. It’s not cool, but many of these tests are designed to get you worked up. Hint: getting worked up is failing the test. Stay detached and in good humor.

For example, a woman testing a man will sometimes tell a guy on a first date about another guy in her life. The low value guy will get defensive, withdrawn, and angry (or just give up). A high value guy won’t care. After all, he has all the women he wants!

You always want your answers to these tests to be whatever shows you are cool, relaxed, confident, and in demand. Never show you’re rattled or stressed. And, never show you need her to be happy.

Don’t Kiss Up

Typical dating advice tells guys to buy women dinner, give them flowers, compliment them, etc. These are all good things, but only when she’s already attracted.

If you’re being all romantic with someone you just met or barely know, then it rarely works to earn attraction. Women will take your free dinner or drink, then they’ll leave with the guy who doesn’t kiss up (that they actually find attractive).

When you go out, split the first dinner. Or, go out for coffee and pay for that because it’s cheaper. Be generous and genuine, but don’t cross into kissing up. I’ve never yet seen a woman bribed into dating a guy she wasn’t really attracted to (which is ultimately an insult to her intelligence). There must be mutual attraction first.

In addition, some women will wonder why you’re not kissing up like everyone else. It may make them like you more because they think they need to work harder to earn your affection!

Once you’re certain she’s attracted to you, then start complimenting. If she’s already attracted, making her feel good will only increase the attraction (but don’t go overboard).

About Jonathan Bennett

Jonathan Bennett is a writer, speaker, dating expert, and business owner. His articles have been viewed millions of times, and he has been featured in a variety of publications, including the Wall Street Journal.

Comments

  1. Thanks for your great tips! most women really seek for greater qualities of a guy that makes them satisfied.

  2. awesome article.

    There is a substantial gap between what women say they want and what they actually go for. Largely this is due to how the mind works and how the brain is wired up.

    Asking women what they want in a man gets them to access the part that has very little to do with what they find attractive – the conscious element. This is why women will alwyas tell you they want the sweet guy that tells them they 1000 times a day how much they love them and how they like their man to reply to their texts within a second of sending it.

    However, as your rightly say, actions speak louder than words. Since our behavior and body language mostly run off automatic processes (the subconscious), getting behavioral data is the most insightful into reading what a woman thinks about you or who they are attracted to. What we are attracted to is something that ironically we have very little knowledge of. While somebody could clearly say who they are attracted to, they do not necessarily understand the reasons why. A few surprising fact of human Psychology, but it shows that even we do not understand what drives our attraction to some people and not others!

    No woman on earth would openly admit to be attracted to the guy that is surrounded by lots of beautiful women (Social proof), but realistically they would tell themselves they are attracted to him for a completely different reasons which feels true to them, however if you understand the psychology of human behaviour, you can quickly see that people are not rational in the ways in which they think, and that attraction is something that is driven by forces that we ourselves are often not aware of!

Leave a Reply