If you want to be a popular guy, you have to take charge and make yourself the most popular guy in the place – any place. It takes skill, but once you master it, it makes life a true adventure. To go into any situation and know how to win over everybody is a gift, a gift any guy can learn.
On Wednesday I was picking up food at Subway for a colleague on the way back from a trip. I walked in, and there were two guys in line ahead of me. The guy at the front was tall, athletic, and good-looking. I am not as tall, even though I am good looking (and modest too!). I was having a rare bad day, after getting some depressing news from a friend, and as I walked up to the aisle, I felt my mind telling me to “just be quiet and nice and not make waves.”
Then, knowing that it was just old brain wiring kicking in, I decided otherwise. I didn’t need another boring interaction. Not that day.
I noticed one of the girls working behind the counter was a trainee. That is always a great opportunity for interaction. Below is how it went. Note that I ordered a chicken ranch sub. It is important to the dialogue.
Me: Oh, I see you’re a trainee. You are doing great! [I said with a huge smile, as if very genuine. Remember you always get points just for saying something to them besides giving them your order]. I’d give you a B-.
Girl (smiling, with jaw dropped): Only a B-?? [She said this with fake indignation…if you get fake indignation, you are flirting! If you get real indignation, time to backtrack]
Me: Well, you have to have room for improvement!
Girl: You’re right!… You wanted horseradish sauce right? [She said this with a huge smile. I didn’t get that she was playing at first…I should have known better. She got me at my own game. Kudos.]
Me: No…I wanted ranch
Girl: Haha, I knew that. I was just playing
Me: Ahh, you had better be. I was about ready to bump you down to a C- [I recovered pretty quickly with that comment]…I’ll take red onions on that. [Believe it or not, I actually did order some food, but I was mainly focused on the interaction. My friend is probably grateful her food arrived as ordered!]
Girl: I have always wondered why they call them “red onions” when they are really purple…
Me: You know that is one of the deep questions of the universe that we may never understand [At this point pretty much every guy and girl in the place is glued to our conversation, and my body language is super confident. I have essentially taken charge of the entire room].
Girl: I know, isn’t it?? [She was half-joking and pulling the “I’m ditzier than I really am” card]
Me: You know what is an even deeper question? Why do they call it ranch if it isn’t made on a ranch?
At this point the woman in line behind me and guy in front of me burst into laughter. The dude at the register did the same. He kept saying “that was awesome…that was the most awesome comment I have ever heard!”
The girl was smiling like crazy and laughing too.
I left more confident and feeling better.
And so did everybody else.