History is filled with great men. I’m sure you can think of many of them offhand: Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, Richard the Lionhearted, Napoleon Bonaparte, and Dwight Eisenhower. They don’t even have to be political leaders. Men like Martin Luther King, Jr., Siddhartha (The Buddha) and Jesus all changed the world radically.
Despite all of the differences of time periods, political and religious views, and appearances, they all have one thing in common: they were alpha males.
All of the most confident, successful men throughout history have been alphas, whether it’s success on the world stage, at a local factory, or in a high school. In fact, guys who want to be leaders in any setting should ask themselves how to be an alpha male.
As we’ve mentioned in a previous post about alpha and beta males, a true alpha male is the ideal standard for a man (and women love them).
The concept of an “alpha male” among humans is controversial. Many people believe that given the complexity of human social interaction, it is inaccurate to call any human an alpha (or beta or omega). While humans are complex, it’s hard to deny that our society has differing levels of men, ranging from true leaders to total followers to social outcasts. And, most guys fit more broadly into one category, even if there are nuances.
Now is a good time to take our entertaining and utterly non-scientific “What Type of Male Are You” Quiz! Find out where you fall on the spectrum!
We define a human alpha male as a confident leader that leads within complex human interactions. So, an alpha won’t necessarily be the biggest and most aggressive man; rather he will have the traits that make one a leader within the advanced human social web. Keep that in mind as you read this article.
How to Be An Alpha Male
Most guys aren’t alpha male leaders. They are beta males, jerks (who aren’t really alpha), or worse, omega males. But, it doesn’t have to be that way. While some people are born with a propensity towards alpha behavior (like extroversion, assertiveness, and social charm), no one is truly born an alpha male.
A guy must become one. But, it isn’t always easy, especially when society becomes more and more “beta” and feminized. In addition, many guys have a fear that being an alpha male will turn them into a “douche.” However, most alphas aren’t jerks or douches. These tips will help you be an alpha male without being a jerk or being cold or falling into misogyny.
Also, remember that you can be an alpha male in a relationship, in the bedroom, and at work. You can be the alpha in high school, university, and at home with your wife and children. Once you take on the traits of a leader, it affects your entire life.
Be High Value
The alpha males throughout history and in the present day all have traits or skills that society, as a whole, values. So, if you want to be an alpha male, you’ll have to be a high value man. That means you’re worth knowing and worth following. You are attractive in the broadest sense of the word.
Remember when looking at your value (or lack of it) that men and women value certain universal traits while looking down on others. So, you may be the most knowledgeable person about Hello Kitty memorabilia in your workplace, but no one cares. On the other hand, being the best salesman at your job will get you admired and followed and into relationships.
High value traits are: wealth, being funny, being in great shape, confidence, height, playing an instrument well, status, power, being a great dresser, power, etc. Yes, I said power twice. That is because it may be the most important.
Being an alpha always involves confidence. And, sometimes it may be having a cocky edge. Being a leader requires believing in yourself and your talents. After all, if you don’t believe your own value, why would anyone else?
So, walk with swagger. Hold fast to your opinions (without being argumentative). Believe that you are great and worthy of admiration. Don’t be a braggart or cold, because those guys typically are blowhards. One of the best ways to have true swagger is to act with amused mastery. That shows you have a truly detached attitude.
However, remember that great leaders can also bend and learn from their mistakes. Irrational stubbornness isn’t alpha behavior. But, even if you have to change course or admit being wrong, let that be a part of your leadership, not a sign of weakness.
Be Charming With Social Skills
What separates an alpha male from a cocky misogynist jerk is charm and other general social skills. Even if you are confident and powerful, if you can’t win over others without resorting to force, you’ll never have followers. Reaching this status usually means being charming, funny, and witty in addition to having confidence.
A guy like Alexander the Great could fight for sure, but he was also able to lead an army and get others to want to follow him. So, you’ll need to be intelligent and quick witted too.
Read books, watch the news, practice being witty and personable. Persuade others and be smooth. Get them laughing. Impress them with your knowledge and skills.
Take Charge (Of Your Life)
Most people who seem like alpha males just act the part. Posting about being “red pill” or making comments on blogs doesn’t make a guy alpha. True men take charge of their lives first. Improve your job situation, get your finances under control, lose weight and get fit, etc.
You can’t be a confident leader if your own life is out of your control. So, wherever you are, you’ll have to resolve to be in more control. If you are married, quit letting yourself get mistreated by your wife. If you have kids, step up and be a father. If you work a crappy job, then get another one or start your own business. If you’re obese or out of shape, start fixing that. You get the picture.
Once you step it up in your own life, others will see your confidence and courage and naturally want to follow you. In addition, being in charge of your own life will show others that your efforts to take a lead in other areas are well-deserved. They’ll want to follow you. Owing your “shit” as they say is a key to being a leader.
So, quit being a follower of others and get out and enjoy the benefits that come from being the alpha male!