How To Sweet Talk

salesman talking

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How many people over the years have bought a product because of a successful sales pitch? What about the girl who falls for the charms of the “player” at the bar? On the more sinister side, how many individuals have been victims of conmen?

Although I strongly disapprove of dishonesty, let’s face it: salesmen, the male “players,” and even the conmen are generally…yep…persuasive. The know how to sweet talk.

When dealing with other people, it’s OK to use all your tools to your advantage. And, those tools can include the clever and creative use of words, the criteria for being slick or using sweet talk. Sweet talking correctly can win you friends and dates. So, here are our tips.

Use Observational Humor

Observational humor works when trying to sweet talk for a couple of reasons. First, being able to think on your feet shows you are intelligent, a trait highly valued among men and women. Second,  observational humor requires you to engage the person and his or her environment. And, people and their lives are usually their favorite topic.  Finally, observational humor is also highly valued. You get someone laughing, he or she will typically want to be around you.

Use Language To Manipulate

Sweet talking is largely about the use of words and knowing how to sweet talk also means knowing how to pick the right words at the right time. You’ll primarily want to focus on a couple of techniques. The first is ambiguity, which is using words or phrases that can have multiple meanings. Create ambiguity to sweet talk the other person into giving you your way or to take the relationship to a different spot.

For example, if a girl tells you she’s hot, you can say, “You know, you have been looking hot lately.” Do you mean you think she’s thermally warm or good looking? The answer may not be obvious to her and it will get her wondering. Use this to your advantage to get in sly hints or ramp up conversations in your favor.

Second, use embedded commands or verbal cues to move the relationship to where you want it. For example, if you want a girl to like you, say things like “turn on” in the conversation and use other ambiguous romantic or sexual terms. Be subtle. The point is to influence the subconscious, not be obvious. An example would be saying “I’m trying to work the coffee pot. But it won’t turn on.” Then you follow up with “It won’t make the coffee like I want it, hot.”

Say What They Want To Hear

Most people have an innate need to be liked. They like to hear good things, mainly about themselves. Knowing how to sweet talk almost always involves finding people’s attraction buttons and pushing them. But, remember, you must always do so in an excellent way. Complimenting a girl with low self esteem may not win you much if she thinks you’re just sucking up.

The best way to accomplish the sweet talk is to actually get to know the person and go from there. Build genuine bonds and friendships.

Be Genuine

What separates sweet talkers from cons and criminals is the genuineness of the situation. While getting your way isn’t a bad thing, getting your way at the expense of others is. So, if you manipulate and sweet talk, make it come from a genuine and honest place. Actually build rapport and befriend the individual. Make sure your intentions benefit everyone and the situation isn’t about using someone. Your goal is not to become a scumbag.

Plus, if you’re genuine, the sweet talk is real part of who you are. You won’t have to worry about being “found out” because what you are saying is true and genuine.

I hope these tips helped you learn how to sweet talk. Go out and have fun! But, remember to benefit others in the process too.

About Jonathan Bennett

Jonathan Bennett is a writer, speaker, dating expert, and business owner. His articles have been viewed millions of times, and he has been featured in a variety of publications, including the Wall Street Journal.

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