How To Write A Good Dating Profile

Image courtesy of ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Online dating is really tough, as we’ve pointed out previously. However, it can be done successfully, as we’ve also mentioned. Now we want to focus on one key to having a successful dating experience online: crafting a great profile.

How To Write A Good Dating Profile

Your dating profile is basically an advertisement. You’re trying to advertise to the other members of the dating community that you would make a good partner. Basically, most men and women are looking for attraction, compatibility, and (usually) safety. If you can satisfy these, you’ll likely at least get a response. So, here are our tips explaining how to write a good dating profile (for men and women, but mostly men)

Say Just Enough

This is a common mistake, especially with men. They say way too much in their profiles. While they think they’re casting a wide net to catch as many women as possible, it actually has the opposite effect. The more they write, the more they turn someone off. Remember, it’s like an ad. Concise is best.

In real world dating, there’s a thing called chemistry that overrides the rational part of the brain. Online, that intangible aspect of dating doesn’t exist. So, online daters tend to over-think.

They are checking for compatibility and looking for red flags. They typically scrutinize profiles looking for reasons to reject rather than the other way around. So, if you mention something she dislikes, there’s no chemistry factor to overrule her dislike for whatever it is you mentioned.

You solve this problem by saying just enough to get across who you are. For men, a good guideline is to share anything that makes you look confident, manly, successful, and well-rounded. For the ladies, show that you are feminine, open, and approachable.

Be High Value

Think of the advertisement image again. Do banks include in their ads an entire paragraph about needing to be bailed out or unethical activities by their executives? No way! No company does that. The same should be true of your online dating profile.

Show the world the ways in which you are high value. For guys, this means showing the girls that you are confident and successful. Share how you are physically fit, you work a good job, that you speak your mind, etc.  Don’t come across as bragging, but definitely be a little cocky.

For girls, show the guys that you are pretty and that you’re a normal person who is open to dating guys.

You’ll want to avoid anything that comes across as whiny or needy. This is especially true of men. A dating profile that resorts to begging or whining or sappy appeals will not get a man a date. Never. Ever. However, above all your profile must show that you are safe which means it can…

Never Be Creepy

Being creepy is a deal breaker for dating, especially in online dating where men and women are typically on guard. A creepy person sends a really bad vibe out to others. Evolution has provided us the feeling of creepiness to warn us that something isn’t right with another person.

Most creepers are poor at hiding their true nature and it becomes pretty obvious that they’re weirdos. However, there are also men and women (especially men) who are borderline creepy, but show it on occasion.

Since they don’t know how to write a good dating profile, some people let their creepiness emerge there. That’s a bad idea. Don’t be creepy on your profile. If it’s going to make people uncomfortable, avoid it. Some examples are sexually explicit statements, comments about harming others, revealing taboo secrets, referencing violent or socially unacceptable subject matter, etc.

Spin, But Don’t Lie

You don’t want to say too much on your profile. But, when you do offer information about yourself, don’t lie. Instead, you can “spin” the facts to make yourself look good.

For example, if you work at McDonald’s don’t imply you work as a corporate executive. You can mention you work in the food industry, though, and you’re still good. As far as body type, those are the most common areas of dishonesty. It’s probably OK to add an inch or two of height and take off five to ten pounds. However, beyond that, be honest.

If your goal is a relationship, most people will be turned off by blatant lying. Plus, if a guy lies, it shows that he’s not confident with himself. That’s a big turn off. Put the best spin on your life, but don’t outright lie.

Pick a Normal Photo

This is important to a good dating profile and is actually related to the previous advice. Pick a photo that is flattering, but make it normal. Don’t use weird angles, unusual poses, or anything else to hide the true nature of your looks. It’s really pretty obvious what you’re doing.

Also, don’t choose a photo from the time you looked younger, thinner, or anything else. Pay a photographer or pick a friend with a nice camera and get yourself a good, normal photo from the present.

I’ve seen so many people (especially guys) pick ridiculous photos to showcase for their dating profile. It made them look like complete tools when they were actually decent looking.

Avoid Anything That Smacks of The Friend Zone

This is more geared towards guys, although girls can get friend zoned too.  You’ve created a dating profile. Remember that your goal is to get dates. Keep the focus of your profile on your goal: romance.

So, for guys this means avoiding coming across like her female friends. Don’t use a bunch of smiley faces. Avoid talking about your love for Twilight or anything girlie. This kind of stuff doesn’t make you attractive to her. It only gets you in the friend zone.

So, hopefully these tips will help you create a great dating profile. Check out our dating category page for more tips and tricks.

About Jonathan Bennett

Jonathan Bennett is a writer, speaker, dating expert, and business owner. His articles have been viewed millions of times, and he has been featured in a variety of publications, including the Wall Street Journal.

Comments

  1. I think the best tip to follow is to be honest. In order for a relationship to work, honesty is key! It’s a terrible idea to start a relationship off with lies!

Leave a Reply