A couple of days ago a project I had started didn’t quite pan out the way I had anticipated. My first thought was anger and frustration at having this setback. Sure, I knew it was pretty minor in the grand scheme of things. But when we have certain expectations, it’s easy to be frustrated when our plans don’t work out. It reminds me of a quote about best laid plans…
Fortunately, I snapped out of it and continued moving forward on this project. I changed directions and am now on a path that I hope will be more effective. It made me realize an important point about being a high value, confident man: you must always take the next excellent step, no matter what happens.
Everyone deals with setbacks, whether it’s dating, business, family affairs, or anything else. Life is unpredictable and we can do everything correctly and still not live up to expectations, either our own or those of other people. And, it can be frustrating, especially when we feel like we lack control.
But, we have more control than we think. While we can’t always guarantee the results we and others expect, we can always make sure that we take the next excellent step. To put it a different way, whatever happens, we always do the next right thing.
This gives us more control over our lives in a couple of ways. First, it allows us to learn from our mistakes and not repeat them a second time. For example, an athlete chokes at the most inopportune time. The next excellent step is to practice like hell and get better. He can’t undo his choking. But, he can make sure it never happens again. That’s control.
Second, always taking the next excellent step allows us to have greater self-confidence. Failure is a part of life, but if we always act according to our values and what we know brings success, we know that particular failure isn’t indicative of our personal value. Only when we deviate from what we know to be excellent, do we really fail. Standing fast to our excellent principles makes sure that we don’t suffer low self-esteem over alleged failures.
Always doing the next excellent thing also makes sure that we never really experience true failure. That’s because a man who pursues excellence will eventually see the pieces fall together and find success. Lots of men and women throughout history have failed miserably.
However, the ones who did the next excellent thing succeeded eventually. And, that’s because they didn’t descend to mediocrity or give up. They learned from their mistakes and continued down excellent paths. Eventually, their outcomes caught up to their methods. They became excellent, successful men.
If you have failed a lot or think you have no hope to be successful, don’t give up. Take the next excellent step and continue that, even when you fail. If you aren’t sure what makes a guy excellent, read our book and this blog. We explain, using scientific research and personal experience, how to become truly excellent.