The Truth About Religious Women And Dating

stained glass windowIn college I became involved in a campus Christian group. The girls there all talked up their religious values as they pertained to dating.

Many of them swore off “dating,” preferring to use the term “courting.” They promoted extreme versions of chastity: many refused to even hold hands before marriage, while others insisted they were “embracing singleness” for an indefinite period of time as part of their religious calling.

However, despite these verbal declarations, what they actually did was different. Once they met a guy they really liked, their views changed. Girls who swore up and down they would never “date” ended up doing just that. Ladies who insisted that the celibate life was for them, ended up married within a few months.

I’m not writing this to condemn or judge religious people. I’m certainly not claiming that all religious women are hypocrites. However, I am saying that when it comes to women, evolutionary biology still holds: human nature wins. In spite of grand pronouncements and sincere beliefs, females (like males) still have sexual needs and follow basic behavioral patterns. So, if you meet a religious woman, and she starts saying she “doesn’t date” or won’t cross certain romantic lines, and you want to date her, keep reading.

For some women, stated religious beliefs are “tests” (often called “shit tests”) for men. They want to see how far a man will go in trying to date them. The guys who hear “I don’t date” and give up, fail. Those who hear “I don’t date,” yet don’t care about that supposed hindrance, have a chance at success. For this group, you simply have to push it a little. At this point, religious belief is an excuse just to weeds out the losers. She may be doing this subconsciously and not even be aware of it.

If she says, “I don’t date” in this situation, I suggest using a line like, “I understand where you’re coming from. I thought for a while God didn’t want me to date, but then I knew if God created someone as hot as me, he wouldn’t want me hiding my light under a bushel.” It is funny and calls her out a little bit on that behavior (and it passes her test).

However, some women genuinely hold to religious beliefs, study spiritual texts, and regularly attend worship services. For them, religion isn’t an excuse, but an important part of their life. But, they’re still not impossible to win over, even if they throw out the religion card initially.

First, they are still women. The same rules hold. They may try to suppress their urges and deny the rules, but that doesn’t stop the existence of either the urges or the rules. In my experience, all women, whether atheist or fundamentalist Christian, or anything in between, still are attracted to charming, powerful, high value men. If that is you, then you can win over anyone, even the girl in the hair bun and jeans dress (if that’s your thing).

Second, for some religious women, their religion changes the dating game little. I know many women who are very religious on the outside, but behave no differently than non-religious women in reality. They date the same number of attractive bad boys as everybody else. So, trying to date them will be just as easy (or hard if you don’t know how) as dating anyone else.

Third, some religious girls are very sincere about their anti-dating beliefs and will take more effort to win over. For the vast majority of these girls, it’s still very possible unless they’re taking their first vows to enter the convent (even then, it’s possible). Obviously, as a guy, you’ll have to decide if it’s worth it to accept the challenge. If you really like the girl, then it may be worth it to go through the effort. If it’s not, then find another girl, and that alone may be enough to suddenly propel your “I don’t date” friend into looking at you romantically.

So, if you like a girl who’s very religious, don’t give up. It may take more effort, but she’s just as obtainable as any other female. That is, of course, if you know the right techniques to begin with (and project attractiveness).

About Jonathan Bennett

Jonathan Bennett is a writer, speaker, dating expert, and business owner. His articles have been viewed millions of times, and he has been featured in a variety of publications, including the Wall Street Journal.

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