My freshman year at university, I met a girl who was attractive and friendly. We went on a couple of dates and, after I kissed her goodnight at her dorm room, she told me she thought we’d have a great relationship.
The next day, I called her and heard nothing. I tried again the next few days and left several messages. Nothing. A week later, she finally called and acted like the week of silence didn’t happen. We went out again that night and the process repeated.
That wasn’t the first time I’d been confused by a woman’s behavior and it wouldn’t be the last.
Why do women play games? Nearly every guy has asked that question at some point. Usually they think women play games because they are mean or want to mess with guys.
While some women play games to manipulate or to be jerks, most play games for very surprising reasons that are even grounded in science.
This article will answer the age old question of women and the games they play. So, when a woman messes with your mind, seems to test you, acts flaky, goes silent, gets in a bad mood, and drives you crazy, you can have an answer.
Women Playing Games: Biology And Brain Wiring
The charms and wiles of women aren’t a modern phenomenon. Men from all time periods have experienced the games of women. Many plays, poems, books, and works of art are related to the confusing things women have done.
I’m bringing this up because these games women play seem to be hard-wired into their brains due to evolution. They play them as a survival tool for themselves and their children.
Look at early days of the human race. Life was very dangerous with threats from not only wild animals, diseases, and the elements, but other humans. Men had their brute strength, but the smaller, less muscular woman was especially vulnerable.
To survive the brutal nature of life, a woman had to attach herself to a strong, powerful man who could make sure she was provided for and protected.
How could she determine if a man was strong enough to protect her? While she could go on looks, like height and strength, those could be deceiving. As a second layer to determine his fitness, she could see if he could, essentially put up with her crap. Even in the modern age of independent women and safety, evolution wins. Women still want provider type of guys.
Keep in mind, this doesn’t mean she’s a bad person. Look at it from her perspective: she’s hit on by jerks and losers all day. She wants someone who will fight for her (literally and otherwise). She needs to weed out the losers.
If you’re in a relationship with her, these games are a way of making sure you’re still the same person she fell for when she met you. And, they help determine if you’re still worthy of her attention.
This brings us to the next point, what some people call “shit tests.” This is when a woman tests you to see if you’re strong enough to win her love. These are the most common games and they can come in a variety of forms.
Common shit tests are “I have a boyfriend” (when she doesn’t), “you’re too (short, old, etc) for me to date,” and “I’m not ready for a relationship.” Usually these tests will come early on in the relationship. So, if you meet a new woman and she plays games with you, you’re probably getting tested. If those tests make you angry, sad or cause you to give up, you’ve failed the test and the game.
Some women play games because they have a string of other guys on the line. So, you might be “getting played” because she’s doing stuff behind your back. In the modern world, hot women have almost limitless dating options. If you met her on a dating app and you’re not committed, she might be getting messages from hundreds of guys.
If she is playing games with regards to getting back to you, scheduling dates, and guarding her phone, the chances are good she’s seeing other guys. If you’re just dating, that’s fine. But, if these types of games happen in a relationship, she might be cheating, whether emotionally or physically.
Not Ready To Settle
Playing a lot of games could also be a sign she’s not ready to settle down. You might think the relationship is going places, but she probably just sees you as a fling. So, when things start to get serious, she flakes on you, won’t text back, and so on.
You’ll often see flaky behavior if you two seem close, but she’s not ready to be your girlfriend. If you’re married or in a long term relationship, this type of game playing could mean that she wants more freedom. I’d be extra vigilant if your wife suddenly changes her personality, goes out with friends more and basically lives the single life while married.
How To Win The Game
You can’t just ask why do women play games. You also need to win those games! The way you slow down the games and win her over is by being attractive. Here’s how!
You always have to recognize that she’s playing games and not let it bother you. That’s right, you win the game by showing her that you don’t even want to play. You remain calm, cool, charming, and aloof from it all. You respond to her games and tests with humor and relaxation. This is called amused mastery and it’s key to relationship success.
Not only will you be more attractive, but acting with amused mastery will pass all of her tests.
Women play games to make sure you’re a suitable mate. However, what makes them so special? While you should always be respectful, you should also recognize that women aren’t that amazing. They are human just like men. So, if you can take that hot woman down to her actual level (as a human being with flaws), then you’ll have the right perspective for her games.
You’ll realize sometimes her games aren’t worth it. And, as a confident, valuable guy, you’re only going to put up with so much crappy behavior. After that, you’ll just find someone who treats you better.
If you know a girl who plays a lot of games, then you need to find girls who don’t play a lot of games. Or ones who feel attracted enough to you that they don’t feel the need to test you all the time. You do this by having options.
If you’re not in a committed relationship, then keep your options open. Meet and date a lot of women until you find one whom you truly like and likes you back. And, avoid getting too committed too quickly. There are a lot of great women out there. Find one of them!
If you’re in a relationship and it’s all drama and games, then you might need to figure out if you want to stay in the relationship. Sometimes having options means having the option to leave if it gets too overbearing.
So, now you should have a better idea of why women play games and how to actually win at the dating game. For more tips and tricks to be attractive and successful at dating, have a look around this website.